Cincinnati's Extraordinary Joe

The way Burrow is playing, the NFL playoffs might not include the best quarterback.

Joe Burrow

Josh Allen, Lamar Jackson and Saquon Barkley have nothing to worry about. Joe Burrow will not win the MVP award. They also shouldn’t fret about running into Burrow into the postseason. His Cincinnati Bengals still have to beat Pittsburgh on the road next week to get to 9-8, and then they have to hope the Colts and Dolphins lose one game apiece. The Colts are playing at the Giants and then they’re home to Jacksonville. The Dolphins are at Cleveland and then they’re at the Jets. Slim and none for the Bengals, in other words, and Slim is in the transfer portal.

But the people who run NFL Honors need to figure out how to commemorate Burrow, and what he’s doing, and how little help he’s getting in doing it. On Dec. 1 the Bengals were 4-8. They are 4-0 since then, and on Saturday they squeezed past Denver, 30-24 in overtime, a game that encapsulated the NFL’s nobility and irrationality like few others this year. Burrow was sacked seven times, was playing without his best running back, watched his kicker miss a 33-yarder in OT, and was challenged again to take a Swifter to the mess that surrounded him. He went 39 for 49 for 412 yards and three touchdowns, and at the end he hit Tee Higgins down the sideline with an eye-of-the-needle 31-yard pass. That preceded a prosaic three-yarder TD to Higgins, his third TD catch of the day as he carried around his own knee and ankle injuries, and the Bengals won, 30-24. Maybe Burrow could win the Churchill Award. Never have so many owed so much to one.

In his past seven games, Burrow has thrown 22 TDs. He has thrown four interceptions. He has averaged 342 yards passing and topped 400 twice. In the game before that he threw five touchdown passes. Only Jackson has more 40-plus-yards passes (14 to 12), and Burrow was the first quarterback to reach 600 pass attempts. Jackson has thrown 442, Allen 456. Burrow has been sacked 44 times, Allen 14, Jackson 23.

If Burrow isn’t throwing rainbows in the face of heavy artillery, the Bengals don’t move the football. Those who maintain that it’s tougher to play quarterback in the NFL than it is to do anything else in any other sport can use any Burrow tape as evidence. He certainly makes it look harder, or less desirable, than anyone else going.

Burrow was also Cincinnati’s second-leading rusher, going 25 yards in four carries. Chase Brown had been the Bengals’ top runner but he, too, got hurt. Khalil Herbert took his place but his main responsibility was blocking those trucks that kept bounding out of their lanes in hopes of running over Burrow. When he was given time, Burrow hit 11 of 12 to Higgins, 10 of 12 to Ja’Marr Chase, and nine of 15 to tight end Mike Giesicki. Those completions alone took up 319 yards.

Burrow wasn’t the only spellbinding quarterback on the scene. Bo Nix, the Denver rookie, tied it 17-17 with a 51-yard pass to Marvin Mims, and with :08 left he tied it again by fitting a ball in between Cincinnati defenders Mike Hilton and Geno Stone, and into the strong waiting hands of Mims. The Bengals had already lost two one-point games, two six-pointers, and a 3-pointer in overtime. Most teams have a breaking point, especially when the Bengals face such a list of playoff impossibilities. But Cincinnati’s quarterback doesn’t, so nobody else in a striped helmet is allowed one.

For instance, Denver had just tied the Bengals, 10-10. Burrow was sacked to create a second-and-17. He hit Chase for nine yards. Then he found Andrei Iosivas for 50 yards, but it came back because of an illegal shift. Now it’s third-and-13. So Burrow, with all the defenders running down the wide-outs, hoofs it for 19, and he eventually puts the Bengals ahead with his own one-yard score.

York’s field goal doink also gave the Bengals a permission slip to check out, but the defense refused. They used a couple of time outs and dealt Denver a three-and-out. Burrow got the ball back and the next four plays went like this: 16 yards, 13 yards, incompletion, 31. No field goals here. The next play was the game-winner.

At LSU Burrow had one of the great quarterbacking seasons in college history. He also had Chase and Justin Jefferson as his wide-outs. He was Cincinnati’s first-overall pick, tore his ACL his first year, and took the Bengals to the Super Bowl in his second. In doing so, he led the Bengals to an AFC title victory in Kansas City, and he’s still the only quarterback to win a playoff game in Arrowhead Stadium since Patrick Mahomes showed up.

For those who worry about the cumulative damage that the hungry edge rushers deal to Burrow, they should keep worrying. But they also should know that, after Nov. 30, Burrow’s won-loss record is 13-3, and his playoff record is 5-2.

Odds are that Burrow won’t be playing past Week 18 this season, and any awards should be delivered to him at the ice tank of his choice. Remember that Burrow purchased a Batmobile that was used in one of Christopher Nolan’s Batman movies. After Burrow threw a TD pass against the Browns while he was stumbling to the turf, Higgins said, “Fuck Batman. This guy is Superman.”

Maybe he’s better than that. After all, you can’t find a good phone booth these days.

Otherwise, here’s other notes from the NFL’s Christmas takeover:

Kansas City 29, Pittsburgh 10

– The Chiefs may be transitioning. They’ve spent the year winning split decisions, but on Wednesday they went for the knockout at Pittsburgh. Michael Danna had five of KC’s sacks of Russell Wilson, and seven different Chiefs hit Wilson. The Chiefs were also up 13-0 in the first quarter on two of Patrick Mahomes’ three touchdown passes, as he threw for 320 yards, his second-highest total of the season.

– The Chiefs are finding Xavier Worthy more often. The rookie from Texas and Travis Kelce each caught eight passes and a touchdown. A 12-yard score from Mahomes to Kelce was the final flourish, as Kansas City (15-1) clinched home advantage through the playoffs.

— Pittsburgh is 10-6 and has lost consecutively to Philadelphia, Baltimore and Kansas City by a total score of 90-40. Wilson was 23-for-37 for 205 yards and no touchdowns. George Pickens returned but was relatively quiet, with three catches for 50 yards. The Steelers had no sacks and have only four in those three gauntlet games, and Wilson has been dumped 10 times in that span.

Baltimore 31, Houston 2

— The Ravens have scored 132 more points than their opponents, the third-best differential behind Detroit and Buffalo, and they took a 1-game lead in the AFC North with this no-doubter. Lamar Jackson broke Michael Vick’s record for rushing yards by a quarterback and gained 87 yards on just four carries, including a 38-yard touchdown. Jackson was also 10 for 15 for 168 yards and had a passer rating of 140 or higher for the sixth game. The Ravens have had 16 explosive plays in their past three games, and their opponents have had five.

— Derrick Henry ran for his 16th touchdown, a Ravens’ record, and churned for 147 yards in 27 carries. The defense sacked C.J. Stroud five times and hit him nine times.

— The Texans were 5-1 and are now 9-7. Down 17-2 at halftime, Stroud threw an interception to Kyle Hamilton on the third play of the third quarter, and Jackson’s long run made it 24-2, over and out. Earlier, Houston had a fourth-and-goal from the Baltimore 4-yard-line when it trailed 10-2 and DeMeco Ryans decided to go for it. Stroud threw to Joe Mixon, who was pushed out at the one-yard-line by the apostrophe squad of Ar’Darius Washington and Tre’Davious White. Baltimore took over and went 99 yards, with Jackson throwing the TD to Isaiah Likely.

L.A. Rams 13, Arizona 9

— The Rams’ defense had to line up 74 times on Saturday and gave up one touchdown. In doing so, it led the Rams to an almost-certain NFC West championship, after a 1-4 start. The odds are strong that the Rams (10-6) will get in Sunday thanks to “strength of victory” tiebreakers (don’t ask), and render moot their final game against the Seahawks.

— In their five-game win streak the Rams are 6-1 in turnover margin and 8-2 in sack differential, and they’ve given up two touchdowns in their past three games. Their four sacks all came from rookies and second-year men. Kamren Kinchens and Akhello Witherspoon wrapped it up with fourth-quarter interceptions.

— Arizona had 24 first downs to the Rams’ 12, ran 20 more plays than L.A. did, and Kyler Murray was 33 for 48 for 321 yards. The Cardinals also held the Rams’ rushers to 68 yards. They fell to 7-9 and have lost five of their past six, beating only New England.

L.A. Chargers 40, New England 7

— Jim Harbaugh’s first Chargers team wrapped up only its fourth playoff spot since 2009, and left no doubt in doing so. They had the ball for over 40 minutes, held New England to 11 first downs, did not allow the Patriots to take a single snap in the red zone, and generally played Harbaugh football in getting to 10-6.

— Derwin James had two quarterback sacks and recovered Drake Maye’s fumble, leading to one of two touchdown catches by Ladd McConkey that put the Chargers ahead, 17-0 in the second quarter. New England’s only score was a 36-yard touchdown to DeMario Douglas from Maye, who left the game briefly with a head injury.

— A key for the Chargers was the return of J.K. Dobbins, who ran 19 times for 76 yards. McConkey caught eight balls for 93 yards, and Justin Herbert completed passes to 14 different Chargers. Counting his time in San Francisco, Harbaugh has coached five years in the NFL and gotten to the playoffs four times.

Seattle 6, Chicago 3

— For the fourth time the Bears’ offense failed to score a touchdown. The rain didn’t help, or maybe that was just Bill Walsh and other legendary offensive coaches weeping. Caleb Williams was sacked seven more times, and the Bears were in position for only one field goal attempt. Williams had a first down on Seattle’s 40 with 37 seconds left, but then missed three straight passes and, under duress, heaved an interception to Tarik Woolen. The Bears thus lost their 10th consecutive game and are 4–12.

— Seattle had ten tackles for loss, three apiece by Leonard Williams and Devon Witherspoon. Williams also had four hits on Caleb Williams. So there wasn’t much forward movement. The Bears and Seahawks combined for 23 first downs and 13 punts, and Seattle held Chicago to 179 net yards.

– Geno Smith played a safe game for Seattle, hitting 17 of 23 for 160 yards and no interceptions. The Seahawks are 9-7 and were virtually eliminated from the NFC West race, and the playoffs, when the Rams beat Arizona Saturday.